Sex And The Tri-Cities

"The Picture Does Not Make Me As Good Looking As I Know I Am!" -CJO

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

1...2...3...Sleep!

TG and I went to see an "x-rated" hypnotist last night. It was fun! I laughed, gagged, cried, and laughed some more. It was all the things that I have come to expect from a date with my boy! It was the perfect mixed of comedy and raunchy antics that I have come to love in entertainment!
When we got home we tried to hypnotize our kitties but with no success, therefore Mia is yet to get her nails clipped properly by me - squirmy (and whiney) little bugger...

1...2...3...Wide Awake!

Friday, November 24, 2006

Lesson: If You Are A Tool - Always Wear A Hard Hat!

Scene: Mano goes to get afternoon coffee at bosses request. Since it is a nice day she does not mind getting out of the office and chooses the Tim Hortons a few blocks away rather then the one within walking distance. As Mano approaches the doors into the coffee shop she realizes that there is a small line up of construction workers/city workers...

Mano walks up to the doors and it appears that the last person in line on the inside of the store is leaning on the door which opens by pulling. She begins to pull slowly, as to not startle the worker in line or cause him to lose his footing.

Slimey Worker: (turns around) C'mon in sweetheart - don't be shy!

At that point, a couple of his buddies turn around to see who Slimey is talking to.

Mano: Actually, I wasn't being shy, I was just opening it slow because I thought you were leaning on the door. (I smiled "politely", but for those of you who know Mano it was the "annoyed" smile)

Slimey: "HAHA! That would have been funny if I'd fallen, you would have had to help me...HAHA"

Mano: Actually that is why I was careful, so that wouldn't happen and I wouldn't have to help you and I could just get coffee and go back to work...(cue annoyed smile #2).

At this point what prompted Slimey to pretend to fall is beyond me, but as he raised his arms above his head and jerked his head backwards, he actually did whack his skull on the metal door frame of the Tim Hortons (cue annoyed smile #3 - no wait he is actually hurt..I think?)

Mano: "Are you ok?"

Slimey: " Uhh, Umm...Yea."
(Please note that a couple of construction workers and city workers are laughing, and laughing hard at Slimey's expense)

Mano: (cue annoyed smile #3 again - since he is ok)

I am sure that ultimately the only thing that was hurt was his ego - but it sure did seem like he hit his head hard.

Random Worker: "See Buddy, you should wear you hard hat like me, right until you go home - HAHA!"

Good one....(cue annoyed smile #4)

Thursday, November 23, 2006

I am with a bad boy - that's right TG is a rebel. It turns me on to know that TG could have, maybe, possibly, had the slightest chance, of going to the "pokey" today. He finally got his public spanking in court for his speeding violation on his way back from Chi-town. I say violation because it sounds more dangerous then "ticket"don't you think?! I guess the only way he would have maybe gone to jail was had he not shown up for the judge, and even then I am sure that would have just given him community service...*yawn*! All kidding and fantasy aside, I am glad everything turned out ok.

Holiday Public Service Announcement:
As December approaches, I encourage people to look for and act on the true spirit of the season. When it comes to gifts, I like to get them and although I am very thankful for everything and everyone I have, I can be selfish and sometimes I forget that not everyone is as lucky as I have been.
That said, look around communities and see were help is needed. Volunteers are wanted, donations are required and you are able to help. I encourage everyone to make just one small contribution of time or money in your local communities to a charity/organization of your choice during this holiday season. I am sure you will feel good about it and that is what the season is all about - making people feel good. (Insert inappropriate sexual innuendo here - sorry couldn't resist!)

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

This Sucks! In Fact - No. It Doesn't Suck!

Ok this sucks...or for that matter is not sucking. I hate broken toilets - enough said.
What I do love is when TG comes home and says "Babe, I got you the fancy plunger!" Gee...Thanks. Honestly though, it is a pretty cool plunger as far as plungers go....

Went to get a pedicure and manicure with D last night and it was good times. A small asian man actually did a kick ass job painting my nails - I was nervous, he told me that he wasn't gay, and in my head I kind of wish that he was. Stereotyping, it would have made more sense while he was applying glitter polish to D's toes and decorating the tiny holiday tree she had air-brushed on to satisfy the little one. It was all a little odd but I was happy to pay for a job well done.

I told D about a little implied "engagement pool" me and some of the other girls have. I can't really call it a pool when everyone that I talk too about it all agree that it will be before the end of the year. So I guess it is really not a bet, but just more like an agreement and simple girl talk.
No one will actually be able to say "I told you so!" or "I knew it was going to happen!" because seriously, we all do...including you! If I did have money riding on it *cough* day before New Year's *cough* I would split it with you D - I promise!

Cheers!
-Mano

Monday, November 20, 2006

Weekend Wrap Up...

Well - for the most part it was a relaxing weekend. I got a lot (*a lot) of laundry done, got the condo tidy, and cooked a couple of good meals.
Only hectic time came at about 4am on Sunday when the toilet decided to overflow causing me to use all the towels that I had just washed (they were still warm and folded in the basket for pete's sake) to clean up the mess. Not fun, and after peeing in the shower (no, I am not impressed with myself...) my parents came over bright and early to fix the problem which as it turns out may not have been our fault - whatever the cause, it is fixed now despite the sounds of a transport truck/leaf blower going through out apartment every time we flush...the point is we can flush!

I am very happy/relieved to report that my Dundas country girl walked away from a car accident this weekend. As much as I hate to say it, you should have hit the dog but instincts tells us to swerve. Love you girl - too bad about all the hassle but I am glad you can laugh about it. I knew that watching all that TV would someday come in handy! xo

I also learned that a very dear friend in Toronto did have a great time with her "mate" over the last two weeks and from what I hear he earned his keep while in Canada! I also hear that she was an awful tour guide, well that is what I understood anyways!

My newest (and pointless) debate: Daniel Craig - The Best 007 Bond ever OR UFC Contender?

Friday, November 17, 2006

It's Been A While...

It's been a while since I have had nothing planned, scheduled or generally to do on a weekend! There are some things I want to accomplish this weekend, for example, the bathroom could use a good cleaning, laundry is piling up - but otherwise I have no major events or outings and I love it! It gives me a chance to maybe (maybe) go to the gym, go for a hike with TG if the weather is nice, rent a movie, go to a movie, cook, clean, pamper, drink...whatever. It is going to be a good weekend.

It has been determined that the company holiday party weekend is December 8th/9th. I have never been to a significant others holiday function and to be honest I am a little nervous. So to solve that I have made a hair appointment (cut/color) and plan on getting cute yet sassy dress to wear. The right combo (and a glass of wine) will be the ticket to event success for me. I am also nervous because I am determined that the executive assistant of TG's company is trying to steal him away form me - or at the very least clearly flirting with him. I am saying this sarcastically but figure I should share none the less. Well, she may indeed be flirting but I am not jealous...and told that I have nothing to be jealous about despite the stain on TG's pants when he came home from work the other day...it is a running joke - funny eh?
I think the errands she has to do/creates does not always need the assistance of my man as well as the fact that she recommended an Old Navy sale to TG indicating that perhaps he should forward the info to me or go buy me a gift? She claims that she got a tank for $0.99...the whole scenario is odd to me, I don't know why?
TG told me that I could"take her" so I am not concerned and it will make the party a little more interesting for all should I challenge that claim!

Happy Weekend Folks!

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

City Mouse/Country Mouse - A Little of Both Please!

Country music appeals to all kinds of people - the old, the young, the boys, the girls, the rich, the poor - every one! I think that is part of the appeal for me. Not that I appreciate the mullet and the nascar/snap on jackets but I do appreciate variety.
I can be a top 40 girl any Saturday night and although I have a good time almost all the time, country music and the atmosphere it provides is really something else, and I always enjoy an interesting crowd! Only at a country bar would it be acceptable for a 40-something women to raise her chicken wing triumphantly, while singing along to Adam Gregory "ringing those horseshoes"! Ok, so it didn't happen at the exact same time but it was ridiculous none the less.

From the country to the city - word on the street is that the lovely ladies of Sex and the City will be reuniting on the big screen?! Could it be?! I think that would be fantastic and that there is a lot of money to be made from a project like that if it is done properly. You will need the original cast, including Big, and no cheesy "closure" plot stuff. I will be watching for updates online and keep my fingers crossed...

Ciao!

Monday, November 13, 2006

I Am Surrounded By Good People

I have good people in my life.
Whether it's the best friends you go dress shopping with, or the guy that will run down to the car with a spotlight to look for my "lost" wallet while I cry about it upstairs, I love the people around me - period.
I love that when we are apart it's ok and we miss each other and then when we are together we pick up where we left off - that, to me, is what makes good (and lasting) relationships.

For such a busy weekend and upcoming week, I am surprised that I do not have more to blog about. On the bright side, if the above comments are what I have taken away from what I actually experienced (both the good and bad) this past weekend, I consider it all a success. Some pills are just too hard to swallow at first, therefore sarcasm is my fall back - like it or not. I promise I will learn to deal but I will not give up dancing on the tables - that I can do despite my choice of footwear!

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

You Know What I Love...?

...Leaving things to the last "minute" and although I am sitting pretty good, for my paper that is, and stressing about it all day. I will more then likely stress about it until I get my mark. I want it off my plate so I can start looking forward to things again.

A big congrats to my dear red-neck friend who has marked the end of a era with a engagement - finally! Good job "Jesus", I know what you're all about...
You are right LW, we will always have the singledom memories of Cali, which now that I think about it, involved one of the most scary nights of my life and I hope to soon forget! Just kidding, Mohagany loves you and I can't begin to describe all the memories I have with you. SHIRT SWAP!

While making a to-do list today I was reminded of something an ex-not-really-my boyfriend once said to me. He once asked me (out of the blue) if I shopped at a Buck or Two, to which I replied, "why? do I look cheap?" I thought that was an odd question to ask when getting to know someone. He replied "No...crafty - you look crafty!" He seemed to be satisfied removing his own foot from his mouth once realizing that he may have offended me. I tried to ignore the comment, but ultimately realizing I had just experienced the beginning of the end. Everyone knows that Dollarama is where it at!

TG has some memorable quotes. Some are clever, some witty, some cute, some offensive, and some very funny. I will leave you with one he said to me this past weekend (minus the context) and I will let you decide or guess what category it falls into:

"When the time comes, we can just pull the chair in front of the TV if it's so comfortable"

Hmmmmm...

Friday, November 03, 2006

What I've Learned About Red Wine...

I've learned that red wine in combination with a crackling fire on a Thursday night causes me to:
A: Be really out-of-the-norm "lovey-dovey" then;
B: Get a little moody then;
C: Act really sarcastic then;
D: Pass out during my favorite TV shows then;
E: Have a headache in the morning that just won't quit.

I have learned many things about many different types of alcohol and how it affects my system. I do realize that a lot of it has to do with specific quantities at specific times at specific events.
I have learned the follow about myself in relation the drinks noted:

Gin: Not to be consumed in public mixed with anything - enough said.
Rye & Ginger: Causes Mano to dance on speaker and rip skirt 80% of the time.
Mandarin Vodka & OJ: Causes Mano to forget how classy of a lady she actually is.
Mike's Hard Cranberry: Reminds Mano that when you are 16, 2 bottles will cause you to puke in your mitten on the way home.
Any Combination of Above: Reminds Mano of broken noses, strippers and my dad - don't ask.

I am lucky I have never had an "Attitude Adjustment" otherwise I am sure I would have a unpleasant memory - either that or no memory at all right TG?!


Have a great weekend!
Mano

Thursday, November 02, 2006

"Guilty" Pleasures...

I'll be honest, I don't feel all that guilty about them but I thought I would share my recent TV not-so-guilty pleasures:

1. Laguna Beach - no joke. I must catch the new episodes that air on Wednesdays when I get home from school and before TG gets home from soccer. I have it timed perfectly.
PS - I hate Kyndra and Cameron and like Tessa and Chase - enough said.

2. Beverly Hills 90210 - who ever decided to re-air this fantastic series on Trooper is a genius! I am not the only one "guilty" of this pleasure, no timing is necessary! (He He TG!)
PS - I still hate Brandon and Donna and like David (the best dancer at West Beverly!) and Steve - enough said.

Ciao for now - Mano.